Arrogance is not His Style

God is not Ignoring You (He is not Arrogant)

Friday morning, on my way to work and praying, I fell to crying; and realizing that just because God has the abundance of supply to meet my every need, He doesn't trivialize my pain and confusion. His compassion isn't just a gesture to make me think He loves me. He literally will collapse with me when I am falling apart, and then bring the supply in such a way that my soul knows in experiential terms that He does love me. He doesn't flaunt His power and glory over me to belittle me in my weakest moments. He does not ornately strew His wisdom before me to humiliate me when I'm feeble because of earthly demoralization. Yes, however, He overwhelms me, but not like a "know-it-all" or an all-powerful dominant bully; I am overwhelmed by the love wherewith He loves me. "Oh, How He loves you and me!"

In these times Scripture may consolidate in my mind to paint the picture ... so that even though there may appear to be a disconnect, there is now a connection the awes me before His Presence. Though the passages of scripture may be snippets of stories, they take me closer to Him just like photos from a scrapbook. Below is the passages that came to me first while driving:

Heb.4:15 - "For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin."

Luke 18:13 - "And the Publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto Heaven, but smote upon his beast, saying , God be merciful unto me a sinner."

Luke 15:20 - "And he arose , and came to his father. But when he was yet a great way off , his father saw him, and had compassion , and ran , and fell on his neck, and kissed him."

These passages caused me to mingle feelings of awe with an understanding of how He would provide for the need of those for whom I was praying. I was flooded with the sense of an overwhelming assurance that not only was He able to supply, but He was rushing to supply as I prayed. Oh! How He loves you and me.

See our great High Priest, touched by the feelings of our weaknesses, fully knowing we are paralyzed and have need of Him coming to us. Yes, we feel so unworthy of His care ... we fully expect that He will just pass us by or write us off because of all of our poor and foolish decisions. Then to our surprise HE HAS RUN TO US AND CLOSED THE DISTANCE; and no matter how soiled we may be, in His great compassion He falls into an embrace of us, and kisses us in our most vulnerable moment. Oh, how He loves you and me. (Trust me ... that kiss will bring full supply with it!)

Then a strange thing happened, in the midst of my joy for the assurance of His supply for His own … my heart broke once again and I began to weep as if I had no hope. As this happened these passages then patch-worked into my heart:

I Peter 5:8 - "Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour:"

Luke 16:23 – "And in Hell he lift up his eyes, being in torments, ..."

Rev. 4:11 - "And the smoke of their torment ascendeth up for ever and ever: and they have no rest day nor night,"

Such a stark and horrendous contrast thrown before my heart's eyes! He pulled my heart in a direction to pray for the “lost” ... Oh the hopeless end of those who feel they have no need of forgiveness and have no desire to trust in a God (whom they do not see for that forgiveness). Though many may look unscathed, successful and without a care, that will change abruptly with the last breath or the last beat of their heart as they find themselves in a hopeless never ending chaos without Him. Yes, fully overwhelmed, my heart cannot fathom the fury of a Godless Hell, but He is not arrogant about this end of a lost soul. He has invested the wealth of Heaven to rescue any and all who will call on Him. He calls us to join Him daily in His burden as He lifts ours ... Oh, how will you love, as He loves you and me? Do not be afraid to pray - come boldly to the throne of grace!

HLFA,

Jeff

Something New!

Something New? Everyday! How about today?

Have you ever stopped just for a moment and wondered why do I always desire something new? Do you feel guilty desiring and enjoying new things? Why do things have to get old with use and misuse? Clothing fades and frays. Doldrums set in after the first taste of new. Drive your new car for the first time ... now it is not new. "New" in this mirage of a world is a very important driver on this side of Heaven. Time always distinguishes the Old from the New. Even when I search through scripture my heart is looking for something that my my mind will say "hey, that is different." The desire for NEW will either put us right at His doorstep or leave us empty as we search for something new in the Devil's garbage can.

This week was a "time-out" for our typical ways ... vacation week ... and with it the Lord seemed to give me a break from the normal intensity by giving me a few passages to go "Huh?" He knows that I love the strange verses that create an almost humorous picture for my "easy to entertain" mind.

Verse One that caused a Huh?:

Psalm74:14 Thou brakest the heads of leviathan in pieces, and gavest him to be meat to the people inhabiting the wilderness.
An incredible Seven Headed monster known as Leviathan ... lurks unchallenged within the depths of the ocean terrifying the hearts of the most experienced sailor. But even though the shoreline fishing villages have yet to taste him as a delicacy (let alone stop the nightmares of his potential appearance and destruction of boat and sailor); one day on Main Street in the Wilderness (miles from the shore), all of a sudden it starts raining ... Leviathan parts. The Front page news from the Wilderness Times has a picture of a bunch of smiling children standing around a humongous ugly fish head, and a Headline that reads "Monstrous Fish Fry Falls from the Sky." Go figure, Sailors wouldn't dare try to face the Leviathan but lo and behold, Leviathan fillets just drop from the sky. What a day in the Wilderness!

Verse Two that caused a "What?":

Psalm 76:5 The stouthearted are spoiled , they have slept their sleep: and none of the men of might have found their hands.
The enemies of God are gathered together in their raging war council to make their final plans for tomorrows battle against the King of Kings and His people. "Lights out," and the Warring Host gets their final night's sleep before that great battle. Morning Light flashes, the Enemies of God can't even begin to prepare for battle. What in the world? Mighty men of War stumble around dazed as they search for their weapons??? ... NO ... they can't even find their hands to pick up their weapons. Men who absolutely have no fear for the consequences of their lives as long as they can wield a weapon now have no hands to begin to control their destiny. What a day on the Battlefield!

Daily, we live in a wilderness, a dry and thirsty land which so needs the water of the Word (that slays Leviathan and declares God's Newness). The wilderness needs this "water" pouring through our lives. Moment by moment, we walk through a battlefield that needs to see that our greatest fighting is done on our knees while our God delivers our enemies helpless before us. Our hands are strengthened daily while the enemy searches for his.

(II Cor. 5:17) Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a "new" creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become "New."

(Rev. 21:5) And He that sat upon the throne said, Behold, I make all things new. And he said unto me, Write: for these words are faithful and true.

HLFA,

Jeff

I'm Out of the Way - Hear His Voice!

Psalm 29:1-2 Give unto the LORD, O ye mighty, give unto the LORD glory and strength. Give unto the LORD the glory due unto His name; worship the LORD in the beauty of holiness.

"What would Jesus Do?" This has been used as reminder by the devout to do right, or to stop and think before doing ... so the right decision might be easier to see and do. This W.W.J.D. idea surged in the 1990’s and had been popular enough to become fashion statements, bumper stickers, tattoos, music themes and a pattern mimicked by antagonists ... W.W.Z.D. (What would Zappa do?).

Never the less it actually started with deep devotion and had far reaching and lasting results in the lives of many believers seeking to know Him on a daily basis. Charles Sheldon’s 1896 book In His Steps, was subtitled "What would Jesus Do?" This book actually challenged my life as a young Christian though the book was almost a century old at that time. So when the W.W.J.D. logo hit the trinket and "merch" racks in Christian bookstores in the 90's I was a little irritated. Something the inside of me twists uncomfortably when I see Faith fading into fad. (Pride puffs me up!)

BUT USUALLY THIS IS THE BEGINNING OF A CONFLICT DISTRACTION ... While I'm trying to correct all of Christendom of its shallowness ... a shabbily clothed, new to the faith, believer is standing for the first time in a "Christian" Bookstore (Never knew a store like this existed prior to His new found faith in Christ) and is so excited about all the cool bracelets, T-Shirts and breath mints that can be used to announce the effect his new "Friend’s" love in his life. (I’m humbled by the faith and love of a child!)

My self-achieved knowledge and pride kills my joy and deafens my ear to the real "Mover and Shaker" in this whole thing. My attitude of judging those who appear to profit off of the naïve vulnerable babes in Christ actually dampens my zeal to love all for Christ’s sake. Why do I trouble myself by thinking that any person, movement, law, country, organization, or event can derail God’s Love Plan for Mankind? Who can stop God’s plan? Who can silence the Voice of God? (I am Starting to bow down!)

OK - OK so what if I do know some awesome things that create strength in my soul that carries me daily into situations with great effect for the Kingdom. Do I give this Strength to my selfish irritations and set up a “Separatist” battle station, or do I give it to the Lord in a glorious life of worship in the beauty of holiness? WELL – NO, definitely "NO" to the first thought ... It is already being done and it is definitely an obnoxious stink in the Kingdom. (I realize I am part of the stink!)

OK - OK ... I will give my life to worship Jesus in the Beauty of Holiness. One problem ... Can’t give something that I haven’t a clue as to what it really is. (By the way ... read the verses at the top ... open Psalm 29 and see what happens when our decisions{glory} and choices{strength} bow before Him ... "The VOICE" will be heard and handle all the flow, force, favor, resistance, pride, energy, emptiness, secrets, changes, and people in our lives ... Within this we will find His Strength and Peace) ... Here is a final thought: Oh you Mighty Ones, handicap your desire to control His world, bow your gifts before Him, open your eyes at this level to "the least of these" and let His Voice flow over you and to His world ... and you will be filled with the "Adornment of His Sacred Love of You." Want it? Bow down!

(I am bowing ... Hear the Voice!)

HLFA,

Jeff

Brass or Iron?

The Heaven and Earth as Brass or Iron?

The blitz is on ... with the dimensions being greater than the actual, I need someone larger than life to lead me through this spiritually hazardous wasteland.

It isn't enough to just to sit there and complain when we are bombarded by a media that constantly reminds us of the debauch nature of the world we live in. Even when we step out of the “viewing” room, we are jostled back n' forth in a world that believes that plunging necklines and skimpy revealing clothing is the normal presentation of the body, and filthy “potty” mouth communication is the way to assert and elevate your opinions into the sea of endless deception. Don't just melt into silence and apathy.

The voices of the last generation will become louder, and more obnoxiously belligerent to the idea that there is any other way than theirs. “Stake your claim and claim you stake if you don't someone else will.” “Release the power of the goddess within you.” “Assert your authority or you will lose yourself.” To not bow to the philosophies of the day means you just haven't “evolved” yet, or that you are an uneducated bigot that lacks enlightenment. We are challenged to question and even mock all that is right and good, but at the same time dare not create a “faux pas” by challenging the obviously overt sinful presentations of a Godless worldview.

Turn down the vibe, and look at the immediate world we interact in ... even within our families,we are plagued by heartbreak, anger, disappointment and confusion because we are offered choices of unfaithfulness, dishonesty, immorality, divorce and suicide. And if these choices aren't jockeying for position, they are sitting on our doorsteps just waiting for our lives to fracture into vulnerability. AND just to say, “I know what's right, I do what's right, and this doesn't have anything to do with me” is the quickest way to disenfranchise, disengage, and voluntarily line up for Satan's firing squad.

It was pointed out to me by a scoffer, that even God can't make up His mind, so why follow a God who is confused (he pointed out the TWO verses below): Leviticus 26:19 - "And I will break the pride of your power; and I will make your heaven as iron, and your earth as brass" & Deuteronomy 28:23 - "And thy heaven that is over thy head shall be brass, and the earth that is under thee shall be iron." "Now, which one is what?" What the unbelieving scoffer failed to see in his haste to belittle a God that He could not see or control, was that these verses referred to the “curses” that would plague a man who would choose any other god over the One True God. He failed to see that these statements were just one of the “curses” spoken over a generation who would chose to disobey God (who was offering such great opportunities of blessing as a reward for simple faith and obedience to His opinion). God was letting them know that without Him they wouldn't know which end was up.

Listen ... with your heart to the two verses intertwined: When I refuse to give the rule of my life to God as Supreme, God will break the pride of this choice; and that which is above and below will capture me in unbridled shameful desires (brass); and that which is above and below will become an unbreakable fetter and an impenetrable prison cell with walls (iron) that will crush me with unmerciful, unforgiving, unrelenting containment.

Sin (missing the mark of loving, honoring, and obeying God) is idolatry. Sin refuses to hear God as Authority. Sin does not lead to freedom and security, it leads to not knowing which end is up in a world chained in rebellion against Real Love. God's Real Love in Jesus is the only Hope for this hopeless generation; and if we are His we need to actively live in humble proclamation of His love. The world is truly dying to see us living for Him.

HLFA,

Jeff

God Got my Attention

God Got my Attention (Psalm 17)

1. Hear the right, O LORD, attend unto my cry, give ear unto my prayer, that goeth not out of feigned lips.

I think we might have all been,watching each other. We all stuck out like sore thumbs. He with his awkward hesitant walk and cane; and us with our momentarily out of place skin color. He had 2 giggly women with a fishing pole; and I had one silent woman with a camera. It was safe enough watching from a distance ...but as life would have it ... the shortest distance between two points would land him near our proximity with all of our issues in a collision course.

2. Let my sentence come forth from thy presence; let thine eyes behold the things that are equal.

It was a moment of humor that broke the ice between us. It was obvious he was there to fish with a pole and relax; and we were there to fish with a camera and relax. The humor came when he baited his hook and went to swing his rod. That rod and hook created a “move away” gigglier situation for the two women with him. As he would begin to create his wild crazy swing of the pole, they would laugh and move out of the suspected path of its hooked movement. I broke the verbal distance with a quandary, “How many children have you hooked and cast them in with your swing?” We all laughed with this thought. By the second wild whip of the rod, the two women had removed themselves from the area and away from the conversations that would ensue.

3. Thou hast proved mine heart; thou hast visited me in the night; thou hast tried me, and shalt find nothing; I am purposed that my mouth shall not transgress.
4.Concerning the works of men, by the word of thy lips I have kept me from the paths of the destroyer.

“May I ask, how are you doing?” was all I needed to say to unleash an onslaught of facts that would tell me how GOD GOT HIS ATTENTION. As a younger man, he strayed away from the Lord ... between a car accident, a piece of metal breaking off at a job site and stabbing him in the neck; both causing near death experiences ... God got his attention and now he lives to praise and pray for others. Amazing his desire to convince me that he loved Jesus ... to the point where he shared, “God wakes me up in the middle of the night to pray and I pray even though I am not sure who or what to pray for, so I's pray fo every one in da world whoms I never even met yet”. It was obvious that He really desired a continuous connection, but as I stared into his eyes I could sense the reality of the daily battle he was living.

5. Hold up my goings in thy paths, that my footsteps slip not.
6. I have called upon thee, for thou wilt hear me, O God: incline thine ear unto me, and hear my speech.
7. Shew thy marvelous loving kindness, O thou that savest by thy right hand them which put their trust in thee from those that rise up against them.
8. Keep me as the apple of the eye, hide me under the shadow of thy wings,
9. From the wicked that oppress me, from my deadly enemies, who compass me about.
10. They are inclosed in their own fat: with their mouth they speak proudly.
11. They have now compassed us in our steps: they have set their eyes bowing down to the earth;

“They bring sick babies to me now to pray, and I pray and God hears. A little one, just a month ago, couldn't walk, I prayed –God, let him walk but not like me, And now he is running around with all the others” “God uses me to pray, tho it wasn't always this way!” I could see the ravages of sin that had taken its toll on him, but I could also sense his strong momentary desire to Praise God Loudly and openly (perhaps the two escapees knew this would happen).

12. Like as a lion that is greedy of his prey, and as it were a young lion lurking in secret places.
13. Arise, O LORD, disappoint him, cast him down: deliver my soul from the wicked, which is thy sword:
14. From men which are thy hand, O LORD, from men of the world, which have their portion in this life, and whose belly thou fillest with thy hid treasure: they are full of children, and leave the rest of their substance to their babes.

Had I found the time to tell my “wanderings” story, we would have both found that GOD HAD GOTTEN OUR ATTENTION at different times in our lives when straying was the choice. The awesome thing we all found together was that God makes the lasting “good” difference in our lives ... creating a desire to Praise him and a desire for more of Him. Oh, if only we could judge righteous judgment, and see with our hearts instead of our eyes, how much different our effectual Heavenly living would be. “Christlike” ... to be like Jesus ... is not what we think we see. “Christlike” ... to be like Jesus is a daily awakening to His likeness, and a daily longing for His likeness where ever He may meet us.

15. As for me, I will behold thy face in righteousness: I shall be satisfied, when I awake, with thy likeness.

I saw Harold Holly in my mirror today ... His sin stained eyes, his quivering lips under-girded with staggered broken missing teeth, his unsteady caned walk, his wild fishing rod swing, his unkempt clothing, and beautiful broken smile ... but most of all ... I saw his heart as he desired to make God's praise believable from his life. Harold Holly, we are not so different are we?

HLFA,

Jeff

Darkness Closing In?

Horrors in My Heart

The sorrows of Hell have compassed me about: the snares of death prevented me. I cried!

Very few have dared to look at the horrors of another heart, let alone their own. Are we willing to look into the nightmares left in the heart of one that has faced war, whether soldier or civilian? Will we look until tears roll down our cheeks at the horrendous memories of one scarred by gang related incidents or abusive family environments? Do we want to even begin to sense the horrors of the chemically imbalanced or those controlled by chemically induced mental torture? The fears brought on by potential impending doom or national unrest have ravaged a fearful generation so that they barely can maintain their own sanity. Where is God's promises in the midst of the moments of peril? Where is our heart to go when our lives are truly torn to pieces, and our faith disemboweled?

I watched her months ago as she just wanted to dance ... now all she wants to do is go home even though she is home. Safety is a confusing memory. All she wants is to be held, but she can't even figure out who is holding her and tears begin to flow. She can't put any of the pieces together, because there are so many missing. Why does life have to funnel down to this in the lives of some? It seems to be almost random, and “faith” does not appear to be a guaranty for those looking on.

Years ago I saw them fighting to stay together. Then their lives went behind closed doors only to reappear as a relationship in peril. Love has been replaced with suspicion and fearful apprehension of “its over”. Trust has been vanquished to the land of no return and the fury of love is growing dark and cold giving over to the insidious imps of Hell's hopelessness.

Those closest to heart breaking situations so desperately need of vision of God's unseen rescue, they need to “know” He cares. They need to know that to cry is to hear Him say “Here I am!”

Genesis 15:12 And when the sun was going down, a deep sleep fell upon Abram; and, lo, an horror of great darkness fell upon him ... 17 And it came to pass, that, when the sun went down, and it was dark, behold a smoking furnace, and a burning lamp that passed between those pieces.

God's promises transcend generations, time, incidents, interruptions, catastrophes, plans of men, fears of men, disappointments, intentions, temporal solutions, and anything that would appear to hinder God coming to you or you coming to Him. Read Genesis 15 and see that when God gives proof of his promise to Abraham, Abraham tries to “put the the pieces together”. No sooner does the sun go down and darkness sets in with all of its shadows ... faith flees, horror sets in. NOTE: This does not discourage the proof of God's promise ... the furnace of his faithfulness and the lamp of His truth burns brightly as it passes through the pieces that Abraham tried to put together. There are so many “Theological” ramifications of this passage, but to look no further than the event may help our vision ... hang on to this: God will bring proof of His promises in our darkest hours of fear and trembling ... He will burn in the midst of our best laid failures ... and He will see us through as we see Him in the darkness. Tremble, He is near.

Don't close your eyes ... stare into the darkness of disappointment ... look for His answer, He longs to meet you there. Joshua 1:9 (you gotta look it up if you don't have it memorized).

HLFA,

Jeff

Better Life?

Better Life (always a bit incoherent) or Best Life (always available)?

“A better life”, “the better life”, “better life” ... all of these phrases if searched for in Google or mentioned in the passing, will paint an enormous canvas of thoughts.  For instance: “A better life” may  be something that is an alternative to the life I live now; “the better life” may be a lifestyle that can remove us from the typical life of servitude, and “better life” may suggest there is a way to add quality to my currently failing life. Regardless, if we are not careful, we will miss the opportunity to see the “holy” in the present. We will not even begin to recognize eternity tapping into the “now” to bring us life.

Ten minutes of driving and ten minutes waiting: Two Big Breakfasts with Hot Cakes, two breakfast burritos, two fruit and granola parfaits, one medium coffee with 3 creams and 4 sugars, oh yeah and one fruit and walnut salad... “Is your order correct on the screen?” - “I’m not sure; your screen is not on?” - “sorry, it must still be asleep! Your order comes to $21.15, please pull up to the booth!” - “Here is your $.85 change, please pull ahead to get your order” - The waiting at an empty window is followed by the voice of a frustrated young man... “Sorry it took so long, the parfaits were all the way in the front and someone had stacked them wrong and they went flying everywhere ... I hope it gets better from here” - (Coffee and 3 bags, the order must be correct?) ... I reply ... “That’s OK, maybe the day will get better from here?”

Ten minutes of driving and laying out the breakfast for my aging in-laws (one unexpectedly sick and the other always very dependent) leaves me a little disappointed because ... there is no fruit and walnut salad (aaaaaugh!!) So, I drive back to talk to the sign, (“please pull ahead, do you have your receipt?”), then the booth person decides I am legit because she remembers me (even though I don’t have my receipt), then at the window the perplexed young man says “Here is your fruit and walnut salad; It has to be this weird weather!” ... go figure.  Now it is 7:37 AM. And the recipients are not feeling well enough to partake of the food conquest ... so I encourage them to relax; “the food will be waiting and can be brought to an acceptable temperature when you are ready”.

Now ... life slows down and I get to write this HLFA. It has been a very rough week emotionally, but I refuse to let it rot in the hands of stress and disappointment. I refuse to let “stupid suggestions” and “impatient feelings” rob me of God’s love opportunities. I will be still for this moment. (Sorry, I just leaned away from the computer, sighed and cried ... this is not easy and my God knows it ... intensely!)

Just a few minutes prior to sitting here with you ...
I sat on the brick steps outside of my wife’s parents’ house. With my One cup of coffee (with 3 creams and 4 sugars) -
I begin to think in my normal incoherent way ...
June = 6 and the 2nd day,
 ok Lord begin speaking to me from Psalm 62 ---

“Truly my soul … waiteth upon God, from Him cometh my salvation ...
He only is my Rock, and my Salvation, He is my defense ...
I shall not be greatly moved” ...
“My soul, wait thou upon God, for my expectation is from Him!”

I will not look for the elusive “better” life ... for from His Word ... my soul is found tied to Him. The cord to the “best life” is fastened firm by Him, and between Him and me. He will draw me close when my incoherent vision tries to gain control and my desires only reach for temporal relief. He wants this moment to count for eternity in my life and others. Oh my Soul, long for His Desire to love, and Wait (silent and ready to be astonished and amazed) on Him.

Although my thoughts may not connect and my tears may distort …My Hope is Jesus. “Jesus, go ahead and amaze me!”

HLFA,

Jeff

Delight...is it what I am thinking?

Psalm 37:4 Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.

I wonder if any of us would even get it? He was “the man”, though now in his Eighties, he had built the business from one retail/service center to the eighth largest business of it's kind in the US. And she was the current voice that would greet incoming phone calls, and the isolated face that would welcome visitors in a small waiting room. She would offer them a seat and announce them to their corporate connection further back in the belly of the business complex where he had a “now”rarely visited corner office. If you met either of them on the street your eye may not even start to capture the essence of their existence.

Daily, there would be a performance of love and care that would give them both the sense of grateful significance, but this performance would not take place immediately in the day, that would be too conspicuous; but this vital event would happen through the process of the mornings first couple of hours.

He would arrive to his corner office that was slightly isolated from the rest of the booming business now under the oversight of his son. She would arrive and take her place in a solitary cubical near the front door, “the reception area” that was isolated also from the rest of the booming business just down the hall. When not in, his office would be dark and clean, nothing like the decision cluttered office of his formidable years.  When she was not there, her cubicle would sit empty and neat, and she would be replaced by a sign that would direct visitors to the first receptionist around the corner.

At the decided moment of the morn, determined by the elderly statesman, he would purposefully leave his office and walk past her cubicle but not with out the most sincere “Good Morning, it is so good to see you today”. She would beam back a smile and a similar greeting. He would continue past her cubicle to the retail center comfort center and grab two cups of hot chocolate, one for him and one for her. The one for her would be royally received by her as he would deliver it to her cubicle before heading back to his office.

My gift for my Thursday morning was to be the blessed observer of “the performance”. I was the timely visitor in the small waiting room as the scene unfolded before my eyes. I watched as life and glow filled the room during that mutually longed for event. He was beaming with pride and care as he handed her the daily Hot chocolate, while she sincerely radiated with the reception of that simple gift (Oh, by the way … it was free for anyone in the comfort center next door, but here it had a value that surpassed gold and silver).

When the performance had concluded,and he continued back to his corner office, she stood to peer above the fogged glass that topped her cubicle, to tell me how cold, cruel, impersonal and rude the world was becoming around us … she said with tears in her eyes “ He'll never know how much that daily gift of hot Chocolate means to me, and I don't have the heart to tell him that I don't like hot chocolate because the “giving” means so much to him and me”.  Wow … I was so humbled.

Now as I reflected on the depth of a familiar passage of scripture, that had emerged earlier in the week from my heart's treasure vault... “Delight thyself also in the Lord, and He shall give thee the desires of thine heart.” ...the Hebrew which was once hidden in meditation now came alive. When I, with tender and exquisite delight, focus more on the Lord's gracious movements in His act of delivering daily blessings to me, my heart gets what it so desperately requests and desires … significance in knowing He actively loves me. Our hearts truly do not desires things … the desire of our heart is to be loved.

Today it really didn't matter, the request or the words exchanged … I was treated with contempt and disdain. Any verbalization that remotely felt like a reasonable request was shot down immediately with sarcasm. Embarrassment seemed to be the cruel game plan predetermined for my life. Every bit of energy spent was dust in the wind, because at the end of the day it would buy further groans and distance from those that I needed to appreciate me.... This is actually a hurt that most hearts carry daily (some is self inflicted but most is happening in real time) … they want so much to be loved, to be significant, to be given the attention that says “you matter to me”.

In your daily efforts to acquire... do you leave a trail of devaluation in the wake of your “trying to get ahead”, or does your life and living bring value and significance to the lives of others? Focus on Him and His process of giving you significance, and your life will bring value to others. You say, “I'm not getting it!” Wash your heart with His word, and open your eyes to a rugged cross and an empty tomb … just stare away … you'll get it.

We need each other.

HLFA,

Jeff

Oh Those Eyes!

I can see it like it was yesterday, although he has changed faces, times and places, He still has those beautiful heaven-wonder eyes. Whether deep blue, dark brown, alfalfa field green or hazelnut swirl, those eyes are poking a hole in my inner most being and tugging tears from my aching soul.

I can still sense the texture of his hair (whether dark and matted, cotton candy-like blond, bristly brown, or fiery red) as the fingers of my spirit trace a blessing through each colorful tangle. He is standing outside a large entry door with his rosy cheeked face pressed to the glass making a most awkward expression causing me laugh over and over again.

I see him turning in a crowd looking back at me as the crowd swallows him up once again, but I saw those eyes as he melted away into anonymity, and I sensed the ache of life from his soul … “Where will I go?” ...”Who will love me no matter what?” … “Who will protect my innocence or drag it from my life and rape me of an opportunity to know real love?” Oh, the hurtful look!

Even when I close my eyes I can hear his youthful voice in all it's glory of fresh expression and whimsical questions full of mispronounced words uttered only to create a bridge to my heart. “If God is way up there how can he see me way down here? He must have really good eyes!” “With all the hurting people in the world God must have a really big broken heart...don't you think?”

Through his simplicity biased heart, he senses God feels more, sees the smallest hurt, hears the faintest cry and has the potential to care, give and love so much more than anyone on Earth. He will be comforted in knowing that God cried when the little birdie died in the front yard, even though no one else saw it happen or showed up for the dew glazed funeral … “God cares, yes He does!” “Oh yes He does!” He will argue this until he is blue in the face.

Somehow I have sensed him, in the moments that I have seen the final brokenness on display within the homes of the “funeral”. I even thought I've caught him peeking at me beyond the shrubbery of the memorial garden lanes as if to let me know … “I'm OK, my Jesus has called me home to play!”

No more brokenness, no more lies, no more fear, no more night, no more pain, no more heartache, no more scars, no more stains, no more death. “I can see Jesus now, trust me, He is altogether beautiful!”

“Come unto Him all ye that are heave laden ...and He will give you rest...fer sure.”

Matthew 18: 1. At the same time came the disciples unto Jesus, saying, Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven? 2. And Jesus called a little child unto him, and set him in the midst of them, 3. And said, Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven. 4.Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 5.And whoso shall receive one such little child in my name receiveth me. 6. But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.

Satan and the fallen world we live in are doing everything in their power to destroy the little ones.

That is just the way it is for now, but Jesus is calling the little ones to come to Him. Are you part of that calling? Do not take part with the Scandalmongers who take pride in crushing innocence. Live a life that openly demonstrates a simple childlike faith in Jesus and celebrate the beauty of His pure love for us.

Was it that your heart was made to be broken, was it that your eyes were made for tears and not joy?

HLFA,

Jeff

In the waxing cold of the hearts of the last generation, with the faith of many faltering there too. There's a child looking on, left alone and thought unable. But the Faith that burns inside his heart cries, "Jesus I love you!"Borrowed from "Little Child" 1973 J.J. Redding

Acknowledge Him

I can still hear the otherworldly screams that exuded from my parched lips. I can still smell the stench of rotting bones of other men within the habitat of my daily residing. I can still taste the salt of my tears mixed with the blood of my self inflicted wounds as I would cut myself, relentlessly, and without mercy. I can still feel the reverberating voices of my unseen Captures and their ungodly and unholy demands ripping at me from somewhere inside of my life. Somewhere way in the distance, I saw what I think may have been my wife and beautiful daughter, and the terrified look in their eyes as the growing distance would leave them crippled in the shadows. “He is not himself, he needs some help” … would be words that would  ride a broken tremolo to my ears as I would whirl into a most vehement frenzy of self desecration, and as I would break any hope of restraint to help.   Like a helpless rag doll victim in a terrifying uncontrollable downward free-fall, I was spinning out of control within my miserable circumstances and was waiting for an inevitable catastrophic end (hoping that might bring relief).

Somewhere near, yet feeling so far away … a presence walked onto the shore of my war torn life with such a display of authority that my Captures threw me at His feet without hesitation. They were begging for mercy like I had done for so many turns of agonizing days. Now in this moment, a rescue was enacted, that to this day makes me keenly aware that I am now eternally secure in His everlasting arms. In one incredible moment my rescue will caused so much fear in my countrymen that I will watch them plea “depart from us” to Jesus, my Rescuer; though I myself am seated calmly on my own accord and am fully clothed (hardly recognizable). Strange turn of events!

Without a fight, my Rescuer turns with His Twelve and begins to board the small fishing boat that had brought them to my so lonely shore. As I look about I assume my place should be with Him and begin to follow, but He turns,gently speaks words deep into my soul unshackling the final shame, and bids me to return home to tell of the great compassion I have found this day. Although my my heart ached that I could not follow at this time, I knew that the gift I had been given would pull me full circle to be with Him again someday. My life would now be an object lesson of His great mercy, love and grace … Hallelujah! I was now one of His praise makers.

Proverbs 3:5,6 -Trust in the Lord with all thine heart,and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all “thy ways” acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths.

• Our road, way, path ahead begins with a choice to know and trust Him at the Cross road.
• Our journey on the way is to learn to know Him more and more every day.
• Our direction is to perceive and see, to find out and discern Him working in our lives.
• Our manner, habit, way of life is to longingly distinguish and display the joy life with Him.
• Our of course of life is to know by experience His desire for us and others through us.
• Our moral character growth is to recognize, admit, acknowledge, confess any deviations.

He shall direct (this is an intensely intentional choice of God for us – He shall direct) {He makes right, He makes smooth, He makes straight} our lives in a way, that even the greatest events that could negatively impact our lives will become the greatest source of God's love story to us and through us.

Sometimes following Jesus means that we turn by direction of His Voice, to show His compassion in the places we may have caused devastation. “Amor Conquista Todo” (Love conquers all) Live for Jesus!!!

HLFA,

Jeff