I knocked softly at the door because I wasn't sure what I would find. Years of doctors prodding and poking; countless surgeries and contorted procedures that left her so embarrassed and humiliated. I was worried I would just be another voice that could cause her more pain than comfort. The door was opened and we were greeted with a smile of friendship and true appreciative love... “Come in and see her, and please pray with her”. What we found as we walked into the room where she was curled up under several layers of soft blankets, was one of God's precious ones … suffering. The doctors have turned her over to those who now work with her to manage her pain. She still loves her husband and her family. She prays for her friends,and those she learns of who are hurting. She still reaches out from behind those tired eyes to offer a kind word to let you know how beautiful you are in the sight of God. Even in her suffering she wants to know if you are well, and to make sure that you know you are loved.
I knelt beside her and put my hand on her blanket bound hand. This was not good enough, she would not allow herself to be treated like the untouched leper; so we wrestled momentarily to free her hands from the constriction of the blankets. A light glimmered in her eyes as we were now able to hold hands to pray. Oh how I reached for words to pray, but I felt I wasn't even coming close to addressing my concerns for her let alone pleading for her life. Truly from my vantage point this prayer of mine was so awkward and anemic in its presentation that possibly it was just bouncing off of the ceiling. But something transpired there, she seemed to react as if Jesus was holding her hand, and she breathed in a calm resolution that if it was His desire she might get that opportunity for a miracle. We all gathered with her to hold on to that moment hoping that somehow this moment would make it all go away and that this moment would be the end of a long bad dream.
“Who touched me?” (Mark 5:30) Seemed to shout from my heart that was connected to Heaven. Lord, there are so many pressing in on you. (Mark 5:31)With so many needs how can you sense just one? And all she did was touch the hem of your garment, your virtue went out of You, and that woman in Your Word was healed. “Who touched me?” (Luke 8:45) Lord, I am still waiting and listening. Please speak the same words to this suffering daughter of yours... “Who touched me?” (Luke 8:45) And if so be she hears, her eyes that are so tired from the pain shall regain full youth as the pain flees away as a light driven shadow. Let your virtue flow back in to her and rid her body of the ravaging disease that is now ripping life away from her... piece by piece. Please, she is almost gone. Where is the hem?
I reached for the hem … and found it not there.
I listened for the voice … and longed for the care.
Then what swept through my heart at that point of despair?
Indescribable.
Something moist grazed my cheek and found its way to my heart.
Something eternal that reached and touched a deep unknown part.
What did this moist heavenly wind bring... a brand new start?
Unimaginable.
To join you Lord in my sister's hour of need ...as you halt all time and stop all speed.
To be arrested by truth and covered by light … to rob death of its sting and the grave of its might,
O hear the coo of your wounded and fearful dove,
As we reach for your hem please flood us with your love.
For there, in your love, is no disappointment.
“And when the woman saw that she was not hid, she came trembling, and falling down before him, she declared unto Him before all the people for what cause she had touched Him, and how she was healed immediately.” Luke 8:47
This is where we must start in our daily efforts to live as well as our hours of gravest need. We must realize we have no one else that has full power to care; and so we reach out and touch him without regard for the past, the present or the future. Here is where we reach out with the expectation that whatever happens … Jesus is not our last hope (though He is the First and the Last)...Jesus is our Hope! Here is where we risk all, without fear of reprisal for our reckless abandon to place ourselves in His desire. Here is where we do not measure our ability to perform but our inability to be able to live one more moment without Him. Just like our eternal salvation in which He offers the consolation, “For whosoever shall call upon Him will not be ashamed”. He is not in the midst of us to dishonor us, discourage us, or disappoint us. He will not abandon us, nor allow us to stand there without healing … But will we (with the touch's virtuous response) acknowledge that He will not, no He will not, ignore our desire for Him?
Luke 8:48 – “And He said unto her, Daughter, be of good comfort: thy faith hath made thee whole, go in peace.”
HLFA,
Jeff