Waters of Contention or Connection

“For He is our God; and we are the people of his pasture, and the sheep of his hand. To day if ye will hear his voice, Harden not your heart, as in the provocation (Meribah), and as in the day of temptation in the wilderness: When your fathers tempted me, proved me, and saw my work.”
Psalm 95:7-9

Where does your need drive you? Where does your pain take you? What do you do with that gnawing desire? How do you handle that moment when you can't take it any longer? Where will disappointment take you? Will your painful moment become a point of contention instead of a point of connection?

The scripture that begins this week's thought actually refers to events in the wilderness wanderings of Israel that can be found recorded in Exodus chapter 17 and Numbers chapter 20. These events are driven by the people's need for water, and how the supply of the water was handled. Each time, the people threatened their leaders and hardened their hearts against God in a struggle to relieve their physical pain. You just have to shake your head as you read these accounts because you can see the deja vu and also the differences in the events.

Here is a snap shot view of both events:

Event # 1 (Exodus 17): In the Wilderness of Sin – in a resting place - no water – the thirsty people threaten their leader, and deny their God– the leader pleads with God in the wilderness– God gives a plan to acquire water from the Rock. This is the first “Meribah” - “strike the Rock”. The Rock was struck by the Rod of Moses and out came all the necessary water. God was sanctified but how, by contention or connection?

Event # 2 (Numbers 20): Death in the wilderness is now a reality – in the Wilderness of Zin – in a Holy place – the thirsty people once again threaten their leader and deny their God – the leader pleas with God at the door of the tabernacle – God gives a plan to acquire water from the Rock. The second “Meribah” - speak to the Rock – Moses speaks his anger to the people and then proceeds to strike the Rock instead of speaking to the Rock… not once but twice. Moses now finds that He has hindered the process of setting the Lord in a special place in the midst of the people, and he is denied access to Promised Land (remember that Canaan is not Heaven!) God is sanctified but how, by contention or connection?

Look at the similarities of the 2 events and the differences; for the sake of time - we are not going to swim in all the theological implications found in these passages. My humblest apologies to those people who love to squabble over the deeper Biblical implications of passages of scripture, but in the midst of the story of the waters of “Meribah” is a basic truth that God wants us to take away. The need that gnaws at your life is not to create strife and contention between you and your God, but to further provoke a closer relationship with Him.

When you are faced with a great distressing need in your life, what you do in those moments will either walk you into even more pain and disappointment (contention), or a deeper more grateful understanding of God's loving care for you (connection). The reality in these events is that God will be Set Apart. He will either be set apart as an adversary or as a loving advocate.

The reality for His kids is He will always be our advocate (because of the Grace extended via Christ's blood that was shed for us) – He will take care of us. He will put up with our complaining in the pain. He will put up with our disappointment with timing; and He will put up with our disappointment with Him. But when an event crushes in on us and we hear His voice ... don't contend; connect and let Him begin His healing care for us. OH, by the way – weeping may endure for a night season (and He is there), but joy will finally come in the morning (knowing He is there). Don't spend the night season wrestling with yourself ... Wait on the the Lord!!

HLFA,

Jeff

"What is it?" is enough!

I looked back briefly at the fresh graves behind us as we moved toward a more permanent residence to regroup and recoup after The Tragedy. I heard the place we were leaving was called “Kibrothhattaavah” , which meant “the graves of those who lusted”. The whole tragic event was so surreal, just a couple of months ago the whole congregation all seemed to be content with the daily supply of “What is it?”. Every morning, we were all surprised to find that our supply (of what looked like small dark seeds and tasted like“fresh sweet oil”) to strengthen our joy was always there to revive us as we moved forward to our promised rest.

As I now look back, I am amazed at how the shadow of death had crept in on us until it was a welcome guest in the midst of our fellowship. And “They” came with the shadow… "the Gatherers", "the Collectors", "the Hoarders". They started taking a stand in the middle of our gatherings and began growing in numbers. They would constantly whine and complain, and try to take more of this daily provision for joy than was necessary; and hoard it.

Each evening though, they would find their coffers full of rotting and maggot infested sorrow instead of the daily joy that could have been theirs at the break of every day. Every night you could hear them weeping at the door of their dwellings as they would look into their putrefied stash, and bewail the fact that “more” was what they needed even though it would rot. Every day they would try to raise the bar of their gathering, and every night they would cry “How Long?”. If they could only have more, then they would be happy.

Even as this scene repeated night after night, it began to intensify and weary those who were content to be surprised with “enough for today”. This selfish longing of "the Collectors" had now transcended to an ungrateful lust for the things that they had previously hated in the land of their captivity. These “Gatherers” actually fell so low that they began despising not only their daily supply of joy but also the Supplier. Their overt lack of gratitude was even beginning to convince the Contented that maybe the Collectors were more spiritual because they longed for “more”. This was about to be put to the test.

Seventy Men gathered with our leader near the Wilderness Assembly Point. They were filled with the same Spirit as our leader was, to proclaim the need for gratitude, the need for contentment, and of the coming judgment upon those would would continue to lust. Two young men in our camp, named “God has Loved” and “Love”, actually had not joined with our leader as planned, but they too were filled with the Spirit to proclaim also (this was a little troubling because now the message of love from above was clearer than before). And the message was clear, “Be Content; or you will receive what you have lusted for, and it will be your end.”

Numbers 11:19, 20 – “Ye shall not eat one day, nor two days, nor five days, neither ten days, nor twenty days; But even a whole month, until it come out of your nostrils, and it be loathsome unto you: because that ye have despised the LORD which is among you, and ye have wept before Him, saying, Why came we forth out of Egypt?”

The Next thing I took knowledge of was two winds began to turn against each other, creating a waterspout from the sea. Instead of water dumping on us, it began raining Sea Birds. It rained so hard that we were up to our knees in birds as far as we could walk in either direction in a day. Many people started acting crazy and gathering the birds in piles (the least I saw gathered would have filled about twelve - 55 gallon drums).And the disgusting feast began until it ended with nostrils filled with raw meat and feathers, and graves being dug. The test was over.

Be very careful to be very grateful for your daily provision from the Lord. He wants to be the source of your Joy, and is more than sufficient to lavish you with His love. A lack of gratitude will cause you to miss that He is with you. A lack of gratitude will cause you to long for the life that was killing you. Be content with your God, and wait with thankful anticipation for your daily “What is it?”

True vibrant life in Christ is found in the daily anticipation of His love surprises.

Philippians 4:6 “Be careful for nothing; but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.”

HLFA,

Jeff

The Unseen Preparation

I was a “brother from another mother” because I talked kindly to a shuttle driver. I was welcomed as a twin to a dark skinned sister because I shared a similar need for glasses. I became the brother of a Jamaican McDonald’s employee because I was wearing the same shirt he was wearing. I found I had an older sister(though I was first born) in Michigan because we were not ashamed to share God's love and care for us. I found reconnection to old acquaintances because of my wife’s choice of travel plans and restaurants. I find that kind words and a soft approachable spirit bring awesome pathways to “God” relationships with beautiful fallen people.

Hold on for a moment! Slow down and pull up on the reins of your heart so that you don't run off at a full gallop into the realm of Mundane. It is never “just another day”. This is the only day that you can count on, that you actually have to experience His great love for you. “Behold, Now is the accepted time, Behold, now is the day of salvation”, … Today if you hear His voice harden not your heart." (this is mentioned in scripture four times). Today is His prepared opportunity for adventure with you.

Stop for another moment – The passage of scripture above shares a place where God's heart is broken: During their wilderness wanderings, the children of Israel were standing in the middle of God's amazing provisions and still could not or would see the wonderful things that God had been doing and was preparing for them each step of their journey. Possibly it was their propensity to whine and complain (which they learned in Egypt), instead of responding with an open show of gratitude for God's goodness to them. This habit of complaining finally that left most all of them dead in the wilderness. This is not God's plan for you, but the example is reported.
  
Those who see God with a grateful heart when confronted by the smallest wonders, will also have opportunities for the greatest amazement and experiences that allow them to be lavished by His passionate desire to love them.

Before we go any further please check your Identity – have you placed your faith in Jesus' death, burial, and resurrection as the full payment of your sins and your only hope of eternal life? This is not meant to be a trick question – let me word it another way to spark devotion... Are you one of His Kid's because of His sacrifice for you? Hopefully the answer is “Yes” , for the journey I am sharing today is for you; (if not, please call on Him while you have breath ...don't delay … don't risk another day ...because “He that believeth on the Son hath everlasting life; but He that believeth not the Son, shall not see life, and wrath of God abideth on him.” John 3:36)

HEY KIDS OF THE KING! – MEDITATE ON THESE THREE VERSES FOR A MOMENT: Psalm 23:5 - “Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies; Thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over." (Devotional Thought – He wants to anoint us with overflowing Joy because of His preparation... where is the overflow to go?)
Isaiah 64:4 - “For since the beginning of the world men have not heard, nor perceived by the ear, neither hath the eye seen, O God beside thee, what He hath prepared for him that waiteth for Him." (Devotional Thought – God, who never changes, has glorious love surprises for those who wait for Him with humble expectation... what is our response to be?)
I Corinthians 2:9 – “But as it is written, Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love Him.” (Devotional Thought – This is a re-quote of Isaiah – with an added emphasis on “love” as to the motive of the waiting in humble expectation... Why is Love now mentioned in the New Testament with the re-quoting of the verse?)
HE WANTS EVERY DAY TO BE AN ADVENTURE OF THE HEART FOR US THAT WILL DRAW US CLOSER TO HIM AND OTHERS IN THE PROCESS.
 
Jesus is preparing ahead of you for the supply for your journey. He is hiding “heart surprises” along the way to remind you that He loves you. He is desiring to connect you to events of eternal consequence each and every day. Those events are attached to people that you meet along the way. Though some you will connect with and others will pass you by, there are no failures in the economy of the Kingdom, unless we refuse to acknowledge the obvious provision of our God. His rest and refreshment that He offers to each of His heavy laden wanderers is found in the opening of our spiritual heart, eyes and ears so we can catch glimpses of His preparation. This preparation is carried on right under the nose of our enemies but right in front of our eyes so He can bring amazement and joy to us if we just allow Him to open up our hearts.

Your voice pattern, your hair color, your smile, your gestures, your clothes, your glasses, your opportunities, your delays, your job, your travels, your travel plans, your meal choices, your appointments, your working, your shopping, your secret time, ...and on and on … He prepares bridges of familiar connection to others so that there is an opportunity for His love to be known by and through you. Real lasting Joy comes into our life when see that Jesus wants to lavish His love on us to love others through us.

O if only we would allow our lives to truly open up for others, we would find His provisions flowing like a refreshing river through our lives. God has prepared the way ahead for this “living waters life” ...instead of being downcast, lift up your eyes and see the salvation of your God, but don't shut down the vision by selfishly feeding and fulfilling only your needs.

One voice singing in the darkness raises hope; many voices joining-in raise courage. Don't let the “Dream Hater” squelch your voice by camping your heart in disappointment.
Trust God's unseen preparation!

HLFA,

 Jeff

Secret Meadow of Cruelty

My strength was near gone and it was so hard to draw a breath without an aching that had now wrapped itself around me like a sweater of steel. Every step and every breath was a labor that I must do, but I struggled at both. I knew the enemy was not far behind, but where in this darkness could I stop to recharge in order to put up a proper fight. “Rest” was what my tortured body was screaming for. “Sleep” was flashing like a caution sign going on and off in my weary mind. There has to be a break in this darkness, a hiding place!

All of a sudden the noises of threatening brutality that seemed not far behind me ceased. Almost miraculously, I was standing on the edge of a beautiful meadow filled with promises of secrets that would satisfy the soul. Every sound from the meadow was welcoming and peaceful. Every smell was carrying my heart to an expectation of the rest I had so desired. It was secluded, and possibly had hidden itself out of the knowledge of the enemy. What would such a destructive offender even consider useful in the beauty of this meadow? With his total focus on stealing, killing and destroying, this part of his domain must have hidden itself from his intolerance for anything that could bless, heal and restore.

Psalm 74:19 – “O deliver not the soul of Thy turtledove unto the multitude of the wicked: forget not the congregation of Thy poor for ever.”

My heart was now beating so loudly that it would possibly overcome the sound of my straining breath. Was this the answer to my deepest need and momentary desire? I took a step into the meadow with my entire being sinking into the expectation of securing success. Here I was overwhelmed with the strong sense that I was safe and protected. Oh, hope was rising and my soul was sizing up the opportunity to regroup, grow stronger, and once again find worth in my life!  

My first step into the beauty of the meadow didn't end me, so I quickly positioned myself to accept the desired rest. Sleep was quickly overcoming my eyes. Soon I curled up on the soft grasses in the middle of the meadow and slipped away into a dreamy “in and out” state of consciousness. With this choice of ease (while I leaned on my own decision for safety), unknowingly, I had given full opportunity for failure to establish its mark on me. The enemy now quietly arose from his hiding place in the midst of the tender beauty of the meadow. He began shackling me to my false sense of hopeful expectation. Here he would chain me to my memories of failure and promises of future defeat. When I would awake, I would be trapped in disappointment, and resolved to further curse my existence. What was this secret meadow of cruelty? And how could I allow myself to be so vulnerable?

Psalm 74:20 - “Have respect unto Thy covenant; for the dark places of the earth are full of the habitations (meadows) of cruelty.”

Why is it that the life we live as believers is so full of disappointing rest areas of empty promises, dashed hopes, and shattered dreams? Why are these beautiful meadows of false accusations, shallow commitments, and “user” relationships just waiting for every tired broken heart that is expecting a miracle? In Psalm 73 the writer stares honestly at the lives of those who have no accountability with eternity and dare to hold a disdain towards God and His people. He openly declares that their lives on the surface seem (though they flaunt their sinfulness and perversion) widely celebrated, overtly happy, openly successful, apparently undisturbed, proudly rebellious, and fearless even unto death. This troubles the Psalmist's soul because it doesn't appear fair in the light of so many of God's people that seem poor, down trodden, out cast, alienated, and deprived of the “finer things” of life. That is until ...vs. 17 - “Until I went into the sanctuary of God; then I understood their end.” It was the “sanctuary” time that revealed what was real!

Now please do not turn the channel just yet. And do not walk away offended... but hear this thought and do something about it to elevate your perception and rise above your self-punishing situation. The only way to get the right perspective for victory above the deception is to develop the habit of running to the “sanctuary” of God. This is an attitude of living that chooses God's Word and promises as far more sacred and reliable than any other utterance or philosophy that radiates from this side of Heaven. This is a habit of life that constantly longs for, listens to, and relies upon the time spent with Jesus in prayer and in personal Bible study. This “sanctuary time” is where we gather the courage needed to not be disappointed in the “meadows” of cruelty. Stuff happens on this side of Heaven.

Satan's voice is so loud and threatening where time with Jesus is neglected. Your defeat is sure when God's voice is distant. Your victory over self-devaluing situations will be proportionate to your “sanctuary time” alone with Him. The answer for relief is not found in the beautiful meadows, but in our beautiful God. Trust Him, spend time with Him, and let Him love you.
 
Psalm 74:21 –“O let not the oppressed return ashamed: let the poor and needy praise Thy name.”

HLFA,

Jeff

NUMB

I'm numb. No, I am not talking about the numbness I get in my left hand because of a childhood disease that was compounded by chemotherapy 28 years later (19 years ago). Come to think of it, this physical numbness seems to be more prevalent during our current troublesome days. BUT, now that you allowed me to mention it, let me walk you through the physiological steps that take place in me that might be key to my more detrimental “numbness”... which is a numbness of heart and soul caused by being overwhelmed by the “cosmos”, the adornment, the world.

Anytime there is a stress caused by awkwardly supporting this weakness or pain inflicted on my life (this can be caused by both physical and mental stress), my upper left torso will literally curl in and stiffen up as a reaction. Although I am unaware of my body's response at first, I will soon sense it as I reach out and try to touch any object only to be greeted with a numbness that will now be evident in my left hand. Sometimes this “numbness” will be accompanied by a twitching sensation in my left brachial plexus (this is near the wing area of the back). This spasmodic sensation, while I was going through chemotherapy, made me think I was having a heart attack. Soon, It would be revealed that I was coddling the pain and stress, and due to this I would pull my body out of joint. The advice when this would begin to happen … “relax and have someone else massage the center of the pain” (My beautiful Wife has helped in this area throughout the years).

NOW – What is the real numbness that I am concerned with? It comes into my soul anytime I am overwhelmed with the inequities that I face on this side of eternity. FACT: Things are “not fair” (so much of the time) and more so when we are facing our own helplessness in the mix ( I can do nothing!). We do not have the ability to see even remotely what God sees, and to know what God knows about the personal nature and character of the billions of individuals on this planet. Satan also … will always throw “innocence” into the bubbling caldron of the “Where is God?” stew. And the deceiver intensifies the issue by supporting our whining with scriptural promises that it appears God has failed keep. {Irritating Sidebar: We will always have excuses why we don't love those that we could be there for … in our own house and own community ... while we continue to complain about the inequities of the Kingdom and failures of God on the other side of the world. }

With the advent of our digital age, our eyes can see further and our hearts can be more troubled because of the vastness of this world's adornment that is littered with atrocities, inequities, and shame. We can be so saturated with the lies of the facade that we will step up as judges; daring even to be judges of righteousness, and begin hurling accusations towards others, towards“church”, towards “faith”, and towards God. We really don't want another perspective when we are numb, because we love to create and coddle our own suffering.

Soon we don't read, heed, or even need God's Word, while His voice gets lost in our spasmodically pained hearts. The numbness takes over, and we become extremely fatigued with the whole concept of life and living for a higher purpose (let alone just living!). Our adversary agrees - “What is the use? … “God doesn't do anything when I pray anyhow.”

When will I learn ... that to move from my numbness and find real life in “coming after” Christ:

• I must vigorously deny myself (disconnect from trying to make a whining name for myself by identifying only with my selfish needs),
• take up “my”cross of Christ (in a visible, DAILY, committed, ownership of the truth of the Cross' effects on my life and the world around me),
• and Follow Jesus (daily moving out of my fragile and quickly fading comfort zone and into the encouraging conflict to rescue eternal souls).

For this discourse here is a pattern for a a prayer request found in Psalm 68:30 that we can also take up when the “not fair” is closing in, and we are bending to judge instead of letting God take care of the situation: “God, please rebuke those standing around with judgmental measuring sticks, goad with correction the stubborn bullish crowd and their mouthy offspring, transform their assets that are given to wickedness to offerings that support righteousness: personally scatter and disperse any people, even family and friends, that get their satisfaction from stoking the fires of doubt filled conflict.”

Start this rebuking with me! 
I must throw away my prideful measuring stick, turn from my stubbornness, stop gathering together with my whining “Jeff” disciples, and crucify my desire to prove I am righteousness.
Bow with me!

HLFA,

Jeff

PS (Prayer Statement) – Lord, please, keep me from the numbness of my heart and soul, so that when I reach out I can truly touch others for Thee in a way that honors you. I will relax and let you massage my pain and numbness away.

What are you doing here?

The Wilderness of Where You Have Been It happened as it always does, an adversary threatened the security of the Spokesman. Up until this time there were many miraculously dramatic events that had highlighted his life and validated his position. Then, as it always does, the threat came … not only to end his ministry but also to end his life. (How would we respond?)

Like most of us, this Servant of God tried to go backwards to find security, direction, safety, a place to sulk in his fear. He was truly worn out. He had given everything for the task, and now was thoroughly drained. He traveled to Beersheba, the Well of the Sevenfold Oath, and left his servant there as he continued into the wilderness where others before him had sought the face of God. Beersheba was the boundary of the kingdom and held much spiritual historical significance for this Servant and so many others like him. Great leaders and great life changing agreements happened here. Perhaps he could find clarity or just maybe he could find relief in death. What he would find (as we will too when we go to God in our hours of desperation) was rest, sustenance, and direction in the Wilderness of Beersheba.

Strengthening would come in the wilderness because God would meet him there but not leave him there. God would get his full attention via a great destructive wind, an earth quake, a fire and finally a still small voice which would repeat a question he had heard earlier – “What doest thou here, Elijah? (Please take the time to read the full story – I Kings 19 – there is so much there for the heart of the servant that feels threatened by an uncertain future). Elijah would answer that question a second time, but God wouldn't leave him wallowing in his rehearsed answer – He would set Elijah moving forward. The safety that Elijah would find would be in trusting the voice of the living God.

Strangely though, God moves Elijah from one wilderness to another? What.. Leave the wilderness of Beersheba, leave the holy mount? It was and is... a must. The Wilderness of the Well of the Sevenfold Oath was a place of “and I, even I only, am left”. It is only to be a place of spiritual retreat and not a permanent residence. If Elijah had stayed in this wilderness, the message of God (that had been spoken through his life) would have died there with him.

{THIS IS THE POINT IN OUR READING WHERE WE NEED TO SLOW DOWN AND THINK … stop, get a hot tea, a drink of water, a healthy cookie … something that will ease the body and mind's need to get it done … relax and think this through:}

The Lord sends Elijah to the Wilderness of Damascus, but why Damascus? (There can be a multitude of great answers but we will consider only one in this discourse.) Damascus would time and again be a stronghold of activity and conflict that would set it as a center of worldly influence. Danger was inevitable there because it was a center of the prideful disrespect for God's true kingdom of believers. Damascus, even today, is a storehouse rich in worldly education and culture that is touted as its own “Kingdom”.

The actual meaning of it's name is one to ponder - “Silent is the Sackcloth Weaver”. There is no need of sackcloth (used as a covering in the act of repentance) in this kingdom. It's occupants feel they can do nothing wrong. In this kingdom of mirages the citizens have no need of repentance. In this shameless, pride-filled, self-absorbed kingdom, the sackcloth weavers have nothing to do, hence, they are silent. This is the place that the watchful eye of the enemy won't be looking because it is his stronghold. Here in this place void of repentance, Elijah is told to go here and anoint those who will carry out God's plan to perpetuate what Elijah had begun.

Wow … not my first choice of direction!

We are still living in the Days of Elijah (And more-so in light of Christ's imminent return)… our portion in Christ's Kingdom is not found in trying to create a monk-like existence that keeps us away from the bright lights of the "mirage" because we feel threatened by the unseen enemy. Our portion is to go into the heart of the stronghold, storm the gates of Hell, rescue the perishing, care for the dying, and share the Good News of Jesus in those places where the Sackcloth weavers are silent.

It's OK to go back to the wilderness where you have been of old with God; but just for a moment, just for refreshment, and just for clarity of thought. But,  rise up now and move forward for the Glory of God. Live openly for Jesus!

HLFA,

Jeff

Happy Mother's Day - 2013

Confusion Was Not My First Choice

 
I Corinthians 14:33 – "For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace, as in all the churches of the saints."  

Oh the shear fear and terror that can sweep over the soul when being left alone in a strange place with strange people.

• The car breaks down in an area of a city known for “crime”, you have no money, you have no bearing as to where you are, your cell phone is dead, and a stranger is fast approaching your car.
• You wake up in a room in a hospital with all kinds of people around you and machines hooked up to you via tubes and wires. There is buzzing, beeping and human chatter but you have no idea how you got there and no idea of your condition.
• No one is talking to you. You walk into a meeting and it seems like no one looks your way nor acknowledges your existence. Finally when you are addressed, you find out you are being accused for something that isn't remotely connected to who you are and what you do, and NOW your sense of security is totally threatened.

This could go on and on … each of us could offer story-like scenarios, drawn from our life experiences, that raise emotional responses that throw us into the whirlwind of fear, shame and confusion. It is like we work off of an undependable GPS system that has a tendency to take us right up to the point of a decision. At that point it then gives us the directions after we have missed our turn...And by then “recalculate” is not an option.

We have all come to the brink of the breaking point. We have all been faced with the “impossible” and have either chosen to “cave in” and live with its looming results, or attempt to seek out relief while operating on a thinning cord of rescue. Those who attempt to handle it all on their own, usually come away with a hyped and short lived victory speech. While right around the corner “bam!”, they sink deep into great loss of life that doesn't always reveal itself until it is too late. Man was not made to handle the impossible but to hand off the impossible. If a situation is way out of my control, then it is way out of my control. The sooner I come to this conclusion … the sooner I can hand it off to Someone who can and longs to do something about it.

An out-of-season choice for leisure, a wandering eye, a lustful desire, a stolen romance, an untimely pregnancy, a cover up via murder … The only thing left was the discovery of the crime and the death penalty... or so it seemed in the life of David. Then the cry for mercy went out, and the impossible was handed off. David learned that God listened … and with each prayer, love grew.

Psalm 116:1,2 - “I love the Lord, because He hath heard my voice and my supplications. Because He hath inclined his ear unto me, therefore I will call upon Him as long as I live.”

Here is a truth for God's kids caught in the cross fire: He has focused His attention on the sound of your voice ...and He personally is ready and is willing and is able to come to your rescue. God is not the author of the events that bring confusion, instability and shame into our lives; but shame and humiliation is an inevitable occurrence on this side of Heaven. Developing a reflex to cry out to our Father will ultimately bring the peace that we need to move forward. PRAY!

Oh by the way – God's support system is also there for you when you violate His word, and bring the confusion, guilt and shame on yourself. This support system is known as forgiveness … but it starts with your confession to Him that you were wrong. Turn to Him for His cleansing. He has never left even one of His Kids, and will never leave any of His kids... unclean.
Quit justifying your sin, and turn it over to Him.

HLFA,

Jeff

The Two Tower Dream Part 1

The easiest thing for me to do is wake up from a dream and just plop it into reality via a piece of paper. The harder thing is to make sense of it and make application without giving someone the beefburgers (this is my term of endearment when talking about calmly freaking out). When I dream, as I have over the years, it doesn't lead me to a “maybe” prophesy of an event in the future. The dreams the Lord has allowed me to remember fall more in line with images that have me focus on the Word of God that He has been weaving into my life.

 I had already gone through the task of writing out this week's thoughts at 4:00 AM and all of a sudden I was overcome with sleep. I actually wandered back to bed (very much against my “get it done” nature). Falling back to sleep I found myself immediately in a dream:
  
I was on my way out of a church service and actually ran into an awesome Christian leader whom I hadn't seen for years.

(Background)I was blessed to be under his ministry during my college years. His vision, his example, his heart, and his preaching set my initial direction for the future. But as I moved into my future of service to the King, rumors of his demise kept popping in from different cruel directions at the most inopportune times. The rumors broke my heart before God. The rumors, through the grace of God, actually gave me protective walls to stay within. I actually carried none of the rumors further than my heart , but if I did share, it was in an effort to have someone pray with me for this fallen servant. I felt at times like the Jonathan of old just wanting to reach out and let this fallen servant know … God does not set his servants on the shelf, He does not cast them away, He does not embarrass them publicly, He has not been embarrassed by them … His grace already experienced the fall and His love remains true through it all.

In the dream I first saw this Servant from a perspective where he was turned away from me, but when he turned to me it was like we had know each other for years (but in the dream I was seeing him as taller but as young as he was in the past). We embraced with promises to keep on praying for each other throughout the years, and he turned to walk away.

This is where reality shifted to allegory. Where would he go and where did he abide? A “dream cam” (this is a device I find in my dreams to capture an event without the embarrassment of actually being there) followed his path to the top of a twin tower apartment complex that was divided by a zig-zag framework of an open stairway. This precarious stairway was the only way to access the single piled apartments in both of these towers. The only rest for the climber would be through the door of an apartment.

I found myself immediately at his apartment door or what I was assuming to be the door to his apartment. It was the very top single apartment dwelling at the very top of the right tower.  So, I opened the door out of curiosity without so much as a knock and stepped right in. The décor of the room which I stepped into was comfortable and almost too familiar. I never had a chance to fully memorize my surroundings when all of a sudden I was flooded with all kinds of swirling emotions. Fear, joy, shame, loneliness, sorrow, glee, embarrassment, pride, power, abandonment, betrayal, welcome, horror, travesty, solitude, love, hate, anger, success, failure, confusion… but overwhelmingly, I felt I had no right to be there. I felt he was there somewhere, this was his sanctuary, and I was invading his privacy; so quickly but quietly I backed out of his home.

As I tried to navigate the descent between the two towers, I realized that some of the steps were strategically loosened in order to cause a fall. The stairs had been pryed loose, almost like someone was trying to orchestrate the daily fall of this man in hopes that he would be taken in his own climb or descent. With this knowledge I was able to get to the bottom but not completely without the fear of my own demise. At the bottom I realized the immense grace that would be needed daily to safely climb from and to this life. It was even more important for my heart to realize the importance of praying for this man. I wanted to pray.

NOW, Awake from my dream … I began praying … straightened the room I was in … I kept on praying … pulled on some clothes for the day … continued to pray … grabbed breakfast, carried it downstairs, and set it beside my keyboard … prayed some more. Wrote the words above … prayed again. Wrote the words below while praying:

We will never know the steps of a another man for we can barely control our own. It is amazing how quickly we can find our way back to sin and vice, but how hesitant we are to restore our steps in the right direction. To judge another is to condemn ourselves. To turn our back on a friend is to abandon ourselves. To protect and justify our own sinful choices is to abandon others. To not forgive and restore a fallen brother is to abandon our God. To not forgive ourselves is to abandon all.

 “He that saith he is in the light and hateth his brother is in darkness even until now. He that loveth his brother abideth in the light, and there is none occasion of stumbling in him.”
I John 2:9,10
“If a man say, I love God, and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen?”
I John 4:20

Pray … for this is the beginning of God's support system for the restoration of any life.

HLFA,

Jeff

The Affliction of the Gravaclavs

“Come quickly Jeff, there is a fellow who has responded to your message, and he is at the altar requesting you pray for him”. (What I found there with this “fellow” at that time seemed almost funny, but as the Lord has awakened this memory, I find it as a painful theme in the lives of so many believers). When I knelt beside this weeping shadow of a man, I heard him weeping and praying; “God please take away my gravaclavs ...please, Oh please take away my gravaclavs.” Gravaclavs?

As I interrupted his praying, to try to console him … I found immediately that I was up against four things – 1. He was drunk. 2. He was broken. 3.He had no idea what I had been preaching. 4.and he wanted a miracle for God to deliver him from something that he did not begin to understand ... "gravaclavs?" (The reason why he was turned over to me - the church counsellors didn't know what to do with him).

As a first year Bible college student, preaching in my home church, I wanted so much to show the congregation and my pastor that I was already a great preacher (youthful ego). I preached a message from John 11 using verse 44 – this was from the story of Jesus calling Lazarus from the dead and from the tomb. It was an awesome story and it afforeded me a cool title for the sermon “Loose him and let him go!” And to note: The delivery was impressive from "my" vantage point even though the only soul that responded to the message was an intoxicated man that was trying to have God deliver him from something he didn't understand.

In my message I had used the word “grave clothes” over and over again. In the church's large auditorium that night there was a formula for misunderstanding: a little whiskey mixed with bouncing acoustics equals the discovery of a brand new affliction to be delivered from called “gravaclavs”. To the heart of this troubled soul it was comforting to feel (I guess) that he had latched on to something he didn't know before he came to church, nor did he understand at that moment. He was reaching out and hoping that this might be the key to deliverance. Let's think about it: Pray to be delivered from something that we don't understand, and then when God delivers us from whatever it was, we won't know what He has done, but everything will miraculously be OK. (or not!) Many times this is where we start ... but to continue this way is oppressing.

Why does this feel so familiar? Why do I find so many tormented in life because they seem more content with being locked in a miserable loop of misunderstanding than to understand and possibly see the way out? John 8:32 – “And ye shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free”. Even this verse at a quick glance can become a mantra that is supposed to work like waving a magic wand and “shazam” we are all of a sudden happy and heading forward in life with an unshakeable victory song. What happened to the rest of the chapter or how about just the verse before it “Then said Jesus to those Jews which believed on him, If ye continue in my word, then are ye my disciples indeed; John 11:31”.  The truth that actually sets us free is JESUS, and having a continued intimate relationship with Him through His Word allows us to walk in freedom from establishing our lives on the slavery of error and confusion.

Confusion will always be waiting on the doorstep for those who don't want to “continue (remain) in His Word”. Frustration will fill the life that wants an instant fix instead of a growing, working, intimate relationship with the Truth. The Truth is revealed day by day as we walk with Him through the growing knowledge of His Word, and finally there will be the full consummation of that relationship once we are with Him in eternity. With so much to learn that liberates us along the way, why do we cling to error to build a case for the reason we are hopeless … and more hopeless than anyone else? (There are a lot of answers for this question but if the truth will continue to be studied and to be known, liberty grows and flourishes.)

The truth is we do need help to be loosed from the “grave clothes” of sin. “Forgiveness” or this “loosing” is not proven by a fantasia feeling moment. It is not just a magical word spoken and all is good. Forgiveness is a commitment to support the departure from a fallen moment. Forgiveness keeps bearing up the one needing the forgiveness. Forgiveness is not a power over someone or ourselves that we forgive, but it is the beginnings of positioning the offense, the offended, and the offender in the care of God's saving grace and mercy. My part in forgiveness is supporting and confirming His love today, God's part in forgiveness is securing my love to His love forever. With this foundation I have power to forgive and be forgiven.

 Loose us and let us go, Lord ... “Loose him and let him go!”

HLFA,

Jeff

Wanted - Passionate Poets of Powerful Praise

It was time again to shake off the night for a moment; all the while a thematic thought continued to occur to me even prior to removing myself from my typical position in sleep (the dead man position making the dying moose sound). As I moved toward the progressive walk from the bedroom to the hallway, and down the stairs to the lower floor office; I was met with the culmination of scriptural thoughts that had be doing a spiritual dance within my heart and mind.

Thanks to my youngest brother, I was reminded once again of who I am... My Mother's "Pastor Son". Although Mom is now securely with the lover of her soul ...it is still her birthday and I will remain her Pastor. She would ask me each year on her birthday to uncover and teach her a spiritual truth in a way that she had never heard it taught before. She would remind me that as her Pastor it would be my responsibility and my privilege to perform this service.

Mom became a creative member of our small “congregations” throughout the years. Her respect, love and care for me as her Pastor was such an encouragement in some very dark times. For instance: Mom would honor me by sharing her dreams and desiring an interpretation of those dreams, which the Lord gladly would use me to encourage her fiery soul. She told me that when she got to Heaven that she definitely would put in the good word for me. Possibly she is the reason (for years now), that I wake up driven to this place of writing these HLFAs.

Our God is alive, and those with Him are too! He is the God of Abraham, Isaac, Jacob and Theresa Redding Lambe. Here you go Mom!

This week, I stood in the midst of the brutality of repeated beatings of my soul, and superficial spiritual skirmishes in the Kingdom due to a shallow command and control type of leadership response to the Word of God (Wow! What a mouthful). To put it in another light I will ask a few questions: Why is it that we constantly want to cheat ourselves of the unlimited blessings of God by our careless attitudes toward the reception of His Word? Why do we take out our frustrations then on others by using the Word to “whip them into shape”? It is so sad, that the term “Creator” seems to have become a word we can use to connect to God but from a vast distance. We somehow have little concept of the creativity that God has unveiled and endowed within us via his living Word.

Allow me to give you an example of His Creative encouragement by expanding a translation of a well known verse. This verse is used many times as a rod of correction instead of the hand of encouragement that it actually is.

  James 1:22 - “But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves.”
This verse was never meant to bludgeon us into Kingdom obedience, but it was to encourage us into a relationship with our Lord that will prove far more valuable and rewarding than a life of sinful choices with seasonable fading results.

Slow down and try this on your heart instead: James 1: 22 - “Hold on ...it is imperative that you are becoming creative makers, producers, authors, doers, artists, photographers, craftsmen, performers, poets of the living spoken Word, and not disinterested or disconnected hearers only, cheating yourselves of the blessing of the creative connection to the Word by letting the word seem cheap and boring to you”. (Read this prayerfully a few times)

 Hey Mom … here it is! God didn't deliver us from the bondage and destruction of sin just to turn us over to spiritual slave traders, who would bore us while beating us into Kingdom come. He has welcomed us into a Kingdom of creative, rewarding, and loving service to Him and others, that blesses us way beyond the fleeting pleasures of a wasted life of sin. If any man has ears to hear …

Now creatively produce a beautiful poetic love endeavor worthy of the gift of the New Life given to you in Christ. Have at it Kids of the King!

Create a love portrait of Him in you.

HLFA,

Jeff