Please try hard to hear the Still Small Voice, O tender broken-hearted Saint. God knows that your pain speaks so loudly and confirms so assuredly with your disappointment... that it is hard to hear words of encouragement (let alone begin to believe those words). The Lord knows that "doubt" has slithered its way into your life, convincing you that it is a permanent resident, and your trusted gate keeper (though you have been misinformed).
The Spirit feels the doubt that guards every access route to your heart to make sure that the song of hope has no opportunity to be heard. The Spirit has stood waiting while doubt speaks so loudly that hope is quickly squelched in a hellish confidence that boldly announces, "Healing is for others but not for you; for God has deemed you unworthy."
Jesus has watched you shift your Faith from Him to a faith in pain's voice, which continues to rip at the very fiber of your spirit. But HE IS NOT DISAPPOINTED WITH YOU, He knows the separation caused by pain - "My God, My God why hast Thou forsaken me?" His love keeps you and remains sure ... for you are His Name's Sake.
This moment is not easy ... but try with every bit of your spiritual fiber to see how you would react if your own child was racked with the torments of pain and the fear that shadows a life threatening event.
The "Pop Culture Christian Voices" all around us proclaim things that never add much to our relief. The "healing" clichés only add to the pressure of our barely bearable reality. But we must stop anyhow and meditate on the deeper truth behind the plastic-wrap façade.
"This to will pass!" But it hasn't. Always seems to be spoken as a hall pass for other believers to relinquish their duties to "weep with those that weep"... This moment will pass, but while it weighs heavily on us .. He will be with us even when we proclaim negative prophesies and curse loudly in the moment.
"You can do all things through Christ". Except this... When pain speaks so loud that we no longer have a voice, Christ will stand in our lives whether we appear to succeed or whether we openly fail miserably.
"He will never leave you!" But they leave and abandon us with a prayer and a pat on the shoulder. Our closest friends may withdraw and stand afar, for so did His disciples for fear of their own lives ... the human condition can only carry grief so far, but He will carry us where others falter, clear through to eternity. Don't judge His nearness by the distance others. He is near, always.
"He will not test you above what you can handle!" Seems to shift the responsibility to our failure to be spiritual enough to receive "the healing". This is always a poorly delivered half truth mixed with a lie ... "GOD DOES NOT TEMPT US!" ... The pain may tempt us to doubt, but He will be there with a way out... "There has no temptation taken you, but such is common to man, but God is faithful, He will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able, but will with the temptation make a way to escape that ye may be able to bear it." I Cor. 10:13 This passage is giving us hope in the battle against the sin that so easily besets us ... pain is an altogether different subject and needs to be handled by entrusting it to His longsuffering, not our impatient waiting.
"And now, LORD, what wait I for? my hope is in Thee." Psalm 39:7
When we are shattered ... we should fear not to speak our pain and disappointment to Him... He will be there for us no matter what we say. His Love Remains ... when all else seems gone... and He is all we need.
Little Children ... lift up your hearts, lift up your hands, He cannot resist to lift you up into His loving arms.
"Hear my prayer, O LORD, and give ear unto my cry; hold not Thy peace at my tears: for I am a stranger with Thee, and a sojourner, as all my fathers were. O spare me, that I may recover strength, before I go hence, and be no more."Psalm 39:12,13
HLFA,
Jeff