Have we ever had to walk on egg shells just to be near someone we loved? We may have even had to conceal our physical and mental scars, and shame with a veil of smiling but hidden self blame. Painfully, we have learned that this "angry one" has a touchy time-bomb personality; and it seemed as if no amount of special care nor hours of special attention can defuse their "tension held", "hair trigger".... anger fuse.
Many lives that coddle and protect dysfunctional relationships carry their self defense wounds into their perception of how God deals with us. True Love from above is distorted and handicapped by a lack of longsuffering from an angry parent, an impatient spouse, a rude relative or a self-absorbed friend. And through this broken lens ... grace is valued as weak and useless.
By cruel careless words yelled and crude wicked gestures thrown our way we could be developing a quick to judge, negative, and reflexive attitude towards eternal Truth. God is seen and espoused as angry all the time; and the truth, that God is touched with the feelings of our weakness, has no place within the life of a real man. This perception has its origins in the sin of Cain, and other murderers throughout the ages.
Be careful that we love appropriately in all of our relationships, the investment in the lives of others is more indelible than we realize ... those relationships that depend on us the most could be the place where the scars are carved the deepest and the fears are most haunting. The "Still Small Voice" may only feel like He is Yelling because of your sin stained perception... be still and know that He is God.
Psalm 6:1-10 (Scarlet Sinner Interpretation)
1 O LORD, please don't yell at me in your anger, and though I am deserving of corporal chastising, please do not carry it forth when the temperature of your displeasure is burning out of control.
2 Mercy - have mercy - have pity and show favor instead of displeasure. When I have piled high the offenses toward those I love, and barricaded myself behind an impenetrable layer of kevlaric pride ... I am almost undone... I have weakened my essence so that there is no longer even an ounce of resilient strength within me; all that remains is these weakened and trembling hands. And why am I so driven to this useless nervous hurry?
3 My soul, my self, my life, my creature, my person, my appetite, my mind, my living being, my desire, my emotion, my passion ... Every thing about me is vexed within this intense seemingly unavoidable anxious disturbing. BUT THOU O LORD --- How Long??? I feel you have turned your back on me ... How Long!!! I cannot bear not seeing your eyes, but I am also afraid of what you will find when you look on me - How Long?
4 Return - turn back, return me, restore me, refresh me, repair me ... Deliver me. Remove the oppression, draw out my personally inflicted poison, draw off the pain I have chosen, take off the pride that keeps me from healing, withdraw the splinters and motes that halt my healing and stifle my vision, equip me for war that I need to carry out against my pride, arm me for warring against my regret, rescue me from the whispers of the accuser that so easily discourage me, I need to be rescued to possibly truly live and love for the first time in my life! Give me freedom ... not because I deserve it, but for Thy tender mercy's sake.
5 When the dirt is thrown over me, my praises will be stifled, and all of the wonder that can be cast upward and outward of thanks and of praises is silenced ... Opportunity as a praise maker has ended. Don't let me die!
6 If there is anything that seems too permanent and perfected in my life...it is this wearying of my soul; that in the night season it makes my bed and potential bier to swim in a restless ocean of emotions; there is an intense melting, dissolving, and liquefying of my life as Tears drain to my resting couch. See my crying!
7 My eye that should spring forth with life giving vision wastes away because of daily anger, vexation, provocation, and grief; my spring of life is pressed into aged familiarity and uselessness by those things and people that have chosen to be adversaries and antagonists to add distress and disillusion to my days. Bring back your vision!
8 (My choice ... To sulk or to war... I choose to war) I command you that live your lives producing wickedness and oppression ... I have no vested part with thee, Depart! For here is an absolute truth and I will bow to its control -- The LORD has heard and will hear my weeping ... And His listening is with great interest and intensity.
9 The LORD hears my cry to supply His favor: He will to take, get, fetch, lay hold of, seize, receive, acquire, buy, bring, marry, snatch, take away my prayer as a treasure for His responsive keeping... He will take loving ownership of me.
10 Let all the beginnings, choices and voices that have set themselves against me: Be Boosh (ashamed) and let them suddenly be disturbed by my turning to You and the Awesomeness of Your Terrifying Majesty; Alarmed that You are there for me; terrified that You are against them; hurriedly they try futilely to move far from confrontation. Let them be disturbed, be anxious, be afraid, be hurried, and be nervous... Because YOU HEAR MY PRAYER.
I John 5:14,15 - "And this is the confidence that we have in Him, that, if we ask anything ... According to His will He heareth us. And if we know that He hear us, whatsoever we ask, We know that we have the petitions that we desired of Him."
His desire is to hear us ... He wants us to know this desire... So pray desiring Him... And you will have your Desire as well as the things you need to live Life Abundant.
Be angry and sin not!!
O to pray in such power that comfort is delivered to those who love You and fear is put into the hearts of those that oppose You.
HLFA,
Jeff